No Justice? No Peace? Know Justice...Know Peace!!!

Well Well I am back with my point of view on somethings that have been happening lately.... Hello People! How the heck are you doing???!!! I hope this blog finds you well and that you have peace! I am staying at my mom's while she is away on vacation and although she is not here, the people who live in her house keep her presences known by keeping the heat set on HELL!!! Yes that is a temperature check your thermostats or better yet read your Bible. BUT that's another story. It is 3:55 a.m. as I start to write this BUT I have been awake since 2:30 a.m., partly because it is too hot in here to sleep and then partly because I made the mistake of looking at my phone going through my Facebook timeline and now I have this uneasiness a feeling that unnecessary loss of life is about to happen in an absurd amount. The Ferguson verdict came bak last night no indictment for Darren Wilson an Officer for the Ferguson Police Department, a White man who shot an unarmed Black kid 6 times...not guilty. NO JUSTICE! NO PEACE! Officer Wilson shot an unarmed Black kid who allegedly was going for his gun, after being suspected of being involved in a robbery. Unfortunately Michael Brown fit the 'profile' of the suspect and was being stopped and something happened that cost him his life. What happened? We will probably never truly know based on the statement read before the verdict was announced people who were supposed to be 'eye witnesses' were telling different stories, stories changed depending on who you talked to and the TRUTH sadly was probably lossed somewhere along the way. It seems to me from the start of this whole tragic scene the victim was made out to be a villian.(Alleged robbery suspect Michael Brown was shot...gangster pictures posted all over the news...suspect Michael Brown....)Michael Brown was a teenaged kid who died before his life ever really started and that is sad no matter how you look at it, no matter how it seemed his life 'may have' gone he still deserved to live it as best he could. Now that the verdict has come back for no indictment for Officer Wilson Ferguson Missouri is on fire. Literally! That's sad. Burning down businesses and looting and rioting will not make Michael Brown come back to life, his life is gone and now you are risking your life demonstrating your anger by being violent and destructive. And who are you hurting...yourself. You are burning down businesses in your own neighborhood, Black owned businesses for what? Michael Brown's death is a tragedy and should not have happened but it did and in order to stop it from happening to someone else's child what are you willing to do? Now this is where I am probably going to piss some people off...it won't be the first time and most likely it won't be the last time. Michael Brown's death could bring some unity and positive attention to the Black community just like Trayvon Martin's death could have...but it didn't. Why? Cause we as Black people don't know how to come together to get positive things done, not since the death of Martin Luther King, Jr., Malcolm X, John F. and Robert Kennedy...protesting in the 60s had a purpose that brought us to where we are today and look how different the protesting has become. Dr. King used non-violence and was able to start the Civil Rights movement, which gave Black people more rights than they had ever had before. (I want you to note that I said protest in the SIXTIES it wasn't that long ago only 50 years....) Malcolm X thought that violence was the answer but realized that in the end violence solves NOTHING! Protesting today has no real purpose what is burning down buildings and looting stores and shooting going to do? Yes it appears to be an appropriate reaction to the situation, but once you have burned down the buildings and looted all the stores and shot possibly other people then what? Now you are out of a job, there is no food or business going on in your neighborhood so you are left with...The only thing I have seen Black people come together to do POSITIVELY is tear each other down. (Look at what is going on with Bill Cosby, that mess was all started by a Black man who got mad cause Dr. Cosby said pull up your pants and stop naming your kids names they can't spell. And look how quickly every other Black person was quick to jump on the bash Bill bandwagon. SAD!) We stopped trying to lift each other up a long time ago and that is sad...I have heard stories that when Dr. King was assassinated people were trying to get their '15 minutes of fame' back then by smearing his blood on themselves so they could say they were in closer proximity to him than they were when he was shot. Trying to make themselves more than they are in that moment so they can have the spotlight for a moment, and have all eyes on me! Sad!!! I have said this before and I say it again now, I truly do not believe that Martin Luther King, Jr. Malcolm X, and ALL the others who died before us died so that we could walk around with our pants hanging down and calling ourselves Niggas or Niggers, whichever you prefer! I believe many a grave has been moved by our Civil Rights leaders turning over in their graves at what they see going on today, and not only them BUT those who were brought here in chains and hung from trees are weeping at what we are doing to ourselves. It is time to stop blaming others for what is happening and start taking a look at ourselves. YES racism is a live and well in America today, it never stopped and it never will until WE DEMAND BETTER! We need to stop greeting each other using the word Nigga/Nigger as a term or endearment. IT'S NOT A TERM OF ENDEARMENT!!! It is a derogatory word that was used to demean and disparage your ancestors, a way to keep them inline and make them feel like they were not only less of a man or woman but not even human. Know Justice....KNOW PEACE! Pull your pants up on your ass and be about something! If you don't have no respect for yourself why should anybody else?! And NO you might think walking around with your ass showing is respectful BUT it's NOT!! Tell me where the respect is in that...show me why I should respect you looking like that and talking some made up language that I don't understand deserves respect? Nahmean?! Do you know what I mean?! Seriously!! Instead of going up to the school cussing out the teacher because they tried to make Shabooboo and Shaquane behave, perhaps you should have stayed out the club and taught them how to behave at home. Just a thought. Stop expecting other people to raise your children and raise them the way you want them to be raised yourself! Yes it takes a village to raise a child....sometimes BUT it depends on who is living in the village. In my neighborhood all the parents at that time were raising their kids to be respectful of authority, adults, and themselves. Kids these days talk back, interrupt, DEMAND things and will actually fight their parents. A thought that would never cross my mind and I think it is safe to say the minds of any of the kids I grew up with. Why? Because you see we were taught better than that AND we wanted to live and keep our teeth in our mouth. Michael Brown, Trayvon Martin that 12 year old boy waving the BB Gun around at the playground when are we going to say ENOUGH??!!! Before we can truly demand better respect or respect in general from White people, we as Black people need to better respect ourselves. Once we truly respect ourselves in our words and our actions then respect is what will be required from everyone else. BUT as long as we continue to kill each other, tolerate gang violence and abuse of drugs, habitual offenders who can only thrive behind bars, coveting our neighbors wife, ass, house, car, etc., walking around with your pants hanging off your ass, greeting each other as Niggas/Niggers and not trying to be about SOMETHING...then we can expect another Michael Brown....another Trayon Martin...another kid waving a BB Gun around on the playground. My eyes were blurry from reading all the posts and comments about Michael Brown and I was sad to see that Ebony feels she has to tell her sons they have no value in today's society "unless they are an athlete and then they are just a million dollar slave". Tears. And to see that Bubba is still bitter because some White girl in Flagstaff couldn't go out with him because her parents saw him as nothing more than a "Nigger". WOW! Your sons have value OUR sons have value and we are so much more than Niggers, we just need to remember that ourselves and respect ourselves enough to demand better. See ya when I see ya! Peace! Mattie

Be Sure Of Your Words....

Hello People! How the heck are you???? It's been a LONG time since I have been on here lots to say but no time to say it. I decided to take time to say this at this time. I received a text message this morning asking me if I knew that a friend of mine had passed away over the weekend. Of course I had no idea that she was gone...tear... SO I had this friend who I met when she was a Senior in High School, I think I could of been her mother, she always said I was twice her age! She would come into my office and harass me and annoy me and sometimes I would just want to strangle her. Some times Sara would sleep on the floor, she could do that cause my office was in the basement of the 'house' we were in and no one every came down there. I'd ask Sara what was wrong with her and she would say 'they changed my medication again'... Then Sara went off to College. I would get a phone call or a email or text from her saying she missed her only 'Black' friend. I would tell her, well I would say you are my only Jewish friend but I have others BUT you are my strangest Jewish friend?! Then I would get a call about her being on Probation at school or about some of the wild parties that went on or losing something while intoxicated...I would yell at her! Threaten to tell her mother on her... then when Sara would call with a problem I would give her my advice on what I thought about one thing or another. I'd ask her if she is taking her medication. To my knowledge they were always adjusting or trying to figure out the right combination of her medication...I guess they never did...my friend is gone now. SAD. Before my friend passed away...we had one of our arguments....BUT this time it was a argument that neither one of us would back down from. I am sorry that Sara is gone. If I had a chance to redo the last argument would I change anything? Probably not, just like I am sure that she wouldn't either. SAD. When you think about the possibility that the last words that you say to someone could actually be the last words you say to them. If you knew that you would probably choose your words more carefully. It is good to be sure of what you believe in and to stand up for what you believe in, but just be sure that when you are saying whatever it is you have to say to someone that those words won't haunt you when they are gone. Although Sara and I stopped speaking I remember that when we were talking we had a lot of laughs...a lot of smiles....lots of memories. I have been searching through my old emails reading old chats, I found one where Sara says "do you really think hooters was the appropriate place to take high school kids for lunch? she clearly doesn't exercise good judgment. Also I think it's funny that we radically disagree on EVERYTHING". We did disagree on everything...I think it may have been that we just wanted to argue she would say Black and I would say White...it didn't matter. Hard to believe she is gone...another message..."she totally deserved it. and admitted that she deserved it. classic. it was like the old days in the basement of the huff. now I just need to shoot rubber bands at someone."....this one was FUNNY "Every time I yell at a driver it ends up being an old person, and then I feel like a total ass-hat. I the remember to breathe before calling someone a fucker." HILARIOUS!! She was funny...she was opinionated. I will miss you my friend its too bad we were both too stubborn to apologize after the last argument...now it can't be done. At least I told her that I loved her and that she would always be my friend no matter what. Just remember when you are arguing with someone or you get mad or angry....BE SURE OF YOUR WORDS as they maybe the last ones you speak to someone. See ya when I see ya! Peace! Mattie

Don't Look Under The Bed....

Hello People!!! How the heck are you??? I hope this blog finds you well!!! I just came back from our Family Reunion in Texas where everything is bigger, like the bugs and the attitudes... We had an awesome time at the reunion, it was the family's 25th reunion, the person who has been responsible for putting the reunion together is stepping down after 25 years this was suppose to be our last reunion...SAD! BUT fortunately another cousin has stepped up and said she will carry on the annual tradition! THANK YOU Theresa C. for all your years of service and THANK YOU Deborah for picking up where Theresa left off. so in 2016 we will gather again and give thanks to God for his mercy and grace and bringing all of us together again. Those are some BIG shoes to fill, but if you are not afraid to ask for help,I am sure you will fit them well. THANK GOD FOR THE 2014 REUNION AND ALL WHO WERE ABLE TO MAKE IT TEXAS!!! The Reunion was GREAT but the accommodations...well...We(my sister Cece and Karen, Ivory and Sydney) arrive in Beaumont, TX on Thursday night and check into our hotels. I am staying at the Hampton Inn and thy are staying at the Fairfield Marriott...NICE! This first night we all have our own bed to sleep in, but after this night people will be doubling up. NOT ME...but anyway....traveling to Texas included a 5 hour layover in Denver. When we left Arizona it was on fire, when we got to Denver we were under tornado warnings, perhaps we should have taken that as a hint and stayed home?! But we didn't. Friday morning I get up to take my shower and get ready we are meeting at the local Waffle House at 10:00 a.m. for breakfast then out to the family plot to remember those who have gone home. While I was in the shower the water went cold so I was standing there freezing....then after awhile it heated back and I finished my shower. I step out of the shower and mirror is all steamed up. I start to dry off but I notice something out of the corner of my eye and I think I am seeing things. I look up at the mirror and across the top of the mirror in the steam it reads, "Don't look under the bed". Don't look under the bed....WHAT THE #%^&%!!! I stare at the mirror looking right to left, left to right and I am thinking there is NO WAY anybody could have come in this bathroom and me not see them, so how did that get on the mirror? I think about it and then I dry off and get dressed...after I look under the bed! Then after I look under the bed I realize that I have obviously been spending too much time with my pigmentary challenged friends, as a person of darker pigmentation would have said AH HELL NAH!!! AND RAN SCREAMING from the room! nekkid (naked in a redneck tone)!! I knew the beds were on pedestals and there was no real way to get under the bed...but I checked anyway. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME!!! People who do stuff like that end up dead!!! Ask the people in Halloween and Friday the 13th!!!! I knew it was impossible for someone to be under the bed but... the scripture II Timothy 1:7 reads, "God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of a sound mind..." When I started my new job that scripture was typed up and stuck on computer monitor, very appropriate especially for me and it helped me maintain and not run out of my room with no clothes! Crazy to think that was written on the bathroom mirror so when you get out...it also made me think these people aren't cleaning these mirrors like they are suppose to!!! REALLY!!!! Come on now...if you were spraying the mirrors and cleaning them like you are supposed to then I would have never seen that...and I wouldn't have had to call the front desk and go off on that lady....see what you made me do!!!:D) I have other stories to tell BUT now the tired is sneaking up on me and I have to work tomorrow so until the next time.... See ya when I see ya! Peace! Mattie

My Buddy!!!!

Coco and Cat!!!

Well its been about two weeks since Daisy was put to sleep….Coco has strangely found a new buddy in a stranger who just happened to show up on our door step one day….I am sure it was divine intervention for such a time as this, so that when Daisy had to go Coco would have someone to help her ease her pain.

I still have no idea where Cat came from and I don't why Gary took to feeding her and taking her to the Vet for a check up and to be spayed or neutered...BUT Cat is here now and it is apparent that she was meant to be, I wonder how long she will stay?

See ya when I see ya!

Peace!

Mattie

Honesty is the Best Policy UNLESS….

SO People! How the heck are you?  I hope this blog finds you well.

I got a letter in the mail today that really just chaps my hide!!!

I have been taking care of my niece, Lou Lou, who has Down Syndrome and other issues that are irrelevant to this story. When I got Guardianship back in January of 2013 I tried to sign her up for all the services I thought she would need or that could help her.  My Attorney had asked me if I wanted child support for her, I said NO! That just sounded weird to me, then he said that I could check into getting her Social Security for her disability. I went down to the SSI place and talked to them about it, got her all signed up and they started paying her about $640.00 per month.  They are currently withholding money from her pay because of something her parents did…WHATEVER it doesn't matter I don't have anything to spend the money on anyway.  

SO I got a letter last month saying they were going to stop her payments because back in 2012 when she was living with her mother in Alabama, her mother earned $1200++ during that year and they may have overpaid Lou Lou during that time.  So unless I come down and explain the money earned by her mother they are going to stop her SSI payments.  I go down there spend 2/3 hours sitting there waiting then I talk to this lady and tell her everything I know, which ain't much cause how do I know what her mother was doing in ALABAMA I live in ARIZONA!  I tell the lady here is Lou Lou's account, her balance is $1600++ and the account is set up like this…. I told her there is a lot of money in her account because I am really not sure what I can spend her money on, so I have just used it to buy her some clothes, shoes and pay for things at school for her, i.e. lunch money etc. I mainly try to keep the balance under $2000.00 cause I know she goes over that amount she will lose it. The lady says, "Oh let me give you this brochure it tells you what the money can be used for, you can charge her rent, a portion of the utilities, food etc." I said oh okay now that I know I will start doing that, I just didn't want to do anything wrong with the money, so unless she needed something I wasn't using it.  She said read the brochure it will give you the guidelines…she was really nice about it really seemed to be trying to help.

TODAY I get a letter in the mail from SSI saying again that they believe they have overpaid Lou Lou for the period of April 2013 through February 2014 in the amount of $2660.10?? This means that they believe that from the time she started receiving payments, when I set them up, until now they have been over paying her. HERE IS THE KICKER….the reason they believe she has been overpaid is "because someone else was providing her FOOD AND SHELTER" they may have been paying her more than she is entitled to receive.  Seriously??? Because I was giving her a place to stay and food to eat and not charging her for it you want your money back now? REALLY!!!! Is the government that hard up for money that they need to take from those in need? REALLY???!!!! I come into your office tell you the WHOLE TRUTH about the situation and now you are going to hold it against me?!!! WOW!

I work for a family law attorney and we tell our Clients to always do the right thing. It chaps my hide when they are making their payments (child support, etc.) and then they get screwed…They are making their payments paying on their arrearages (back payments) and then they get their income taxes withheld, their bank accounts frozen, liens on their property etc., even though they are making the payments like they are suppose to. THAT is crazy to me. Just as CRAZY as SSI saying they overpaid my niece cause I gave her a place to stay and food to eat. WTF!!!  Honesty is the best policy….UNLESS you are dealing with the government! Who does that??????!!!!

I was talking to my sister about this and as I was getting ready to go off, this scripture popped in my head, "Galatians 6:9 "And let us not grow weary of doing good for in due season we will reap, if we do not give up…" God even knew there would come a time when it appears that those who know how to work the system and get over for doing NOTHING…would cause us who try to play by the rules and try to do what is right say…what is the point?  BUT don't get discouraged!!! Even if nobody else sees you HE does and that's all that matters.  

SO I will just cling to that scripture that when I go back down to the SSI place AGAIN whoever I deal with will have heard the audible POP of their head popping out of their ass and understand the lunacy of saying my niece (me) owes them $2660++ because I didn't charge her rent or for the food I gave her. 

WHO DOES THAT???!!!!!!

See ya when I see ya! 

Peace! 

Mattie

It works!!!!

Hello People!!!!

How the heck are you???? It has been a while since I was on here…. my computer Internet SUCKED!!! SO I just decided not use it..BUT it is up and running now!!!

YAY!!!! Now I am back on the trail or track or whatever it maybe….

Even though I have been gone for a few days…week or whatever I am too tired to type now.

I am sure something worth typing about will happen tomorrow and I will be off and typing again!!!

It is good to be back.

See ya when I see ya!

Peace!

Mattie

Childhood Memories…..

What's up people! How the heck are you doing? I hope this finds you well and in good health!!!

It is past my bedtime but I thought I would jot these notes down…

Today we had Chalupa for dinner and Cheesecake for dessert…as I was preparing the 'New York' style cheesecake made in my new springform pan (this is only the second time I have used it…) I started thinking about the holidays when we were little. My mom would be in the kitchen for days cooking cakes, pies, cookies, etc.  She never let us help her she would always tell us to get out of her damn kitchen!!  She said that even when my dad told us to go help her…"Y'all gals go help your momma in the kitchen".  BUT we always got sent away….SAD! 

I have a knack for cooking and I am pretty good at it, if I do say so myself.  And while I was cooking I remembered this one Thanksgiving I think? Might have been Christmas... my mom's friend Marge had sent her son over to the house to borrow some chicken broth or chicken stock…something to do with chicken. He came over in Marge's new car, and where we lived there was a corner you had to go around and then a dip as you were leaving the housing development that we lived in. As he turned the corner the 'chicken' stuff spilled and fell on the floor, and I suppose out of instinct he just immediately grabbed for it and drove off the side of the road into the 'canyon'!!! It was crazy! Everybody in Brannen Homes was talking about that for a LONG time especially since Marge's husband had just bought her that car! He was okay obviously he was scared/shook up after driving off the road, but he had no injuries.  I don't think you could say the same for the car though. Those were the days when you could go to your neighbor or friends' house and 'borrow' food, or seasoning, or Kool-Aid… "go down to Ms. Annie T.'s and ask her if she has some…" go around to Ms. Mary Graham's and get me some…" You could always go to the neighbors for stuff….OR go to the 'Little Sto' and get it from Jalisco!!! Good neighbors and good food makes for good childhood memories!

I am going to be selling my house hopefully…actually the best scenario would be that I get to keep this house AND get another in town. I want a house with a big kitchen and a good size pantry, we had a pantry when I was growing up. You can keep lots of stuff in there AND it is a good place to hide at least it was when I was a kid.  Get me a good size kitchen with plenty of counter space there is no telling what kind of memories I can make!!!:D)

See ya when I see ya!

Peace!

Mattie

Conversations….

Hello People!

How the heck are you doing??!!!!! I hope y'all are doing well!

I missed blogging yesterday, I went to happy hour with a friend of mine and her friends, and got home to late to write…coherently!!!:D) Just kidding I have to far to drive to over indulge and there are too many large animals that can jump out at any time! Like elk or as my cousin's husband calls them…moose, deer, etc. OR even big piles of horse $%^&*!!!!

ANYWAY! I went to see my 'hair stylist' today to get my hair done and we were talking and it seems all our conversations centered around previous posts and blogs that I have written.   

It was weird as I don't believe she even knows I write a blog nor is she my friend on Facebook.  Or was it confirmation that as I thought…I am right!

She mentioned that over the holidays she had watched Shawshank Redemption with Morgan Freeman and after the movie they had a biography episode featuring Morgan Freeman.  She said that during the biography they showed Freeman doing an interview with Mike Wallace, and Mike Wallace said to him , "as a "Black" man…", she said Freeman said to Wallace "from now on I am going to start calling you a "White man"! Freeman said, "What does the color of my skin have to do with anything." Mr. Wallace then asked, "that is how society sees you so how do we get pass this then?" Mr. Freeman said "STOP TALKING ABOUT IT! That's how…" I said I agree. In order for something not to be a big deal you have to stop making a big deal out of it. She said yeah, it is just like the gay community they identify themselves by being a 'gay' whatever…Again I agree! Why is that your claim to fame…what else do you have to offer why is that the most important thing we need know about you? The conversation went on from there….I was thinking this is weird…or it just confirms what I have been saying for a while now.

Then we were talking about parents who raise their children but don't teach their children…so actually they are not really raising them they are just providing their needs with the exception of their moral, spiritual and emotional needs.  My hair dresser says she has a roommate who is in her 20s as a matter of fact I believe she turns 21 next week, her parents treated her like "a princess on a shelf". According to my hair dresser, the roommates parents didn't engage her, or interact with her or show her any affection they just gave her money. Now that they are roommates she has had to teach her little things, social things, she said that the roommate even asked her "do you think I should eat this or get something else????" My hair dresser said she told her I have no opinion on anything you are asking me, which upset the roommate because she thought she was saying she doesn't care. She went to explain to her that she needs to find value in her own opinions and choices! When you are asking someone what do they think about every thing you do...Basically that means you don't have enough confidence in yourself to choose anything or do anything…to believe that you can make a choice that is good for you. You want someone else to think for you that way when things don't work out you have someone to blame it on. Parents should go back to raising their children to have respect for themselves and their elders, confidence in their abilities and to be able to do things and make GOOD choices for themselves.  The conversation went on from there…I was in the chair for seven (7) hours so we had time for plenty of conversations...

Conversations are good things to have I think we need to get back to that…like visiting your neighbors and sitting down at the table talking to each other.

You can learn a lot in the salon chair…about people…gossip and you can also find out different ways to change positions when your butt falls asleep!!! 

Start a conversation with someone you will be surprised what you find out!

See ya when I see ya! 

Peace! 

Mattie

Question(s)...

Hello People!

It is the 16th day of January in the year 2014 time appears to be picking up speed and the year just started. Enjoy your moments!!!:D)

I have a question.

Do you have a sexual preference? 

Do you think it is necessary to announce to the world every time someone chooses their sexuality? I mean do you hear or read about every heterosexual that is heterosexual? Do you hear about every virgin that is a virgin? Every celibate person that is celibate Do we need to know that??? Really…

So why do we have to know about every 'Gay' person that "comes out" or "comes out of the closet" or pops up out the cake or busts through the wall…shot out of a cannon whatever….Do we really need to know that???? Really….

Just wondering….

See ya when I see ya! 

Peace! 

Mattie

Don't Forget the Good Times….

Hello People!

I am going to make this short and brief…hopefully!

I hope this blogs finds you all well and smiling!!!!:D) Smiles can show the world that you will not be beaten no matter what comes your way.  AND you won't! Just remember people will only do what you allow them to do…SO don't let them do it!!!

I work in the legal field and unfortunately the area of practice is not one of the most glamorous…is there a glamorous field in law? I don't know I just know that Family Law is not it….well I guess maybe if you were working on getting children adopted that would be good. BUT...

People going through divorces or custody battles seem to lose themselves in the battle, they are so set on being able to 'get' the other person that they do things I don't think they would normally do if they weren't consumed with the fight. It's like once the papers are filed they forget the years they spent,long each other or strongly liking each other, starting a family, raising children or starting a business and growing it from the ground up. What about the good memories…what was it that made you say "I DO" when you said those words. In the throws of divorce or a custody battle nothing seems to be out of bounds, personal attacks and the children are all fair game. SAD!!!  

God forbid any of you should find yourself in this predicament….BUT should this be the path your life takes…try to remember to take the high road, don't wallow in the mud(pain) and drag everybody else in with you(children…personal attacks). Focus on the good times you had during your marriage, remember why you said I DO! And if all else fails remember that just because this door is closing, there is also another one opening…walk through it with your head held high and a smile on your face and you will see how much sooner you will get over it. The good times and a good support system and you will be surprised how quickly things will change. 

I'm just sayin'

See ya when I see ya! 

Peace! 

Mattie