Like Lambs to the Slaughter….

MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!!

How the heck is everyone doing? I hope this blog finds you well and that you and yours have a MERRY CHRISTMAS and a HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!

2013 seems to be on its way out with a 'controversy' of sorts or at least leaving us all with something to talk about. The Media has spun a web of distrust and division among people in general that what is right is being called wrong and what is wrong is being called right.  SAD, why yes it is!

Lots of things happened this year some note worthy and some not so note worthy, but the not so note worthy was used to deflect from what is really going on in the world and to hide the truth. SAD, why yes it is!

Typhoon Haiyan (local name Yolanda) left an estimated death toll of 10,000 people and more than12,000 injured not to mention the loss of property and total destruction caused.  This typhoon hit November 2, 2013 category 5 'Super Typhoon'! Now, I don't watch the news much so I can't say for sure but how often did you hear about this disaster? How much media coverage did it get and is it still getting any coverage now? Tornadoes were tearing through the Midwest during this time, has there been any updates on those misplaced and devastated by those tornadoes? As I said I don't watch the news much, so I can't say for sure BUT I bet they are not being talked about. I bet we all know about Kayne West and Kim K., Miley Cyrus, Justin Bieber, Justin Timberlake and on an on…SAD, why yes it is!

Now this month everybody is talking about Phil Roberson and Duck Dynasty because of his alleged  'homophobic' comments.  Really?! The question was "What, IN YOUR MIND, is sinful?" Phil's response "Start with homosexual behavior and just morph out from there. Bestiality, sleeping around with this woman and that woman and that woman and those men", he says. Then he paraphrases Corinthians: "Don't be deceived. Neither the adulterers, the idolaters, the male prostitutes, the homosexual offenders, the greedy the drunkards, the slanders, the swindlers - they don't inherit the kingdom of God. Don't deceive yourself. It's not right." (See GQ interview.) They asked this man what he thought was sinful and he paraphrased the Bible speaking from his beliefs and now he is labeled a homophobic, racist, and gets fired from his reality TV show.  SAD why yes it is!  

America is suppose to be the land of the FREE and the home of the BRAVE. Free speech is suppose to be a right that ALL Americans have under the First Amendment. "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or the of the press…" It appears that part of that Amendment still holds true…the part about the press publishing what they want….BUT the part about free speech…I think that part is only allowed in regards to certain things as long as what you are saying is 'politically correct'. Otherwise it appears that your speech can be costly instead of 'free'.  SAD, why yes it is!

Whenever a Christian makes statements concerning their beliefs they are immediately labeled depending on the statement, as homophobic, haters, closed minded, judgmental, etc. I cannot speak for all Christians BUT I don't believe I am any of these things. You ask me about homosexuals I will say the Bible says that a man shall not lay with another man as he would a woman. Not a judgment it is a statement an answer to your question.  I don't have a heaven or a hell to put you in so how can I judge you? We have been so conditioned by the media and those around us that when the truth is spoken, we  immediately call it a lie and call the person who said it a HATEFUL name to mark them with a scarlet letter so everyone will look at them and remember them as the person who hates…. NOT SO! ALL TRUE CHRISTIANS LOVE THEIR NEIGHBORS, BROTHERS AND SISTERS AND EVERYONE THEY MEET AS THEY LOVE CHRIST. Our point of view just happens to be different than yours. Just because I tell you what the Bible says DOES NOT mean that I hate you. That is the farthest thing from the truth. I have nothing but love for you, I may disagree with your lifestyle but it is not my life.  It is your life you live it how you see fit and I will just continue to pray for America in general.  See if I say I will pray for you then again, I am offending you because you have been conditioned to believe that  I think your "lifestyle" or your life, your "homosexuality" your….fill in the blank can be prayed away as if there is something wrong with you. Believe me when I say there is nothing wrong with you, you were made with love so much so love that He knows the numbers of hairs on your head. It appears that freedom of speech occurs for those who are speaking the same language as the politically correct, mainstream media, using feel good words so as not to offend or make someone feel bad about themselves. Everyone wants to be loved and thought of as beautiful and 'okay', everyone needs to know that they have someone cheering for them, even if they are the only one cheering. What they don't know is they have someone who thinks they are BEAUTIFUL! Who is cheering for them to be everything they can be and who wants to lavish them with so much love it is overwhelming. BUT we can't talk about that because that is what the Bible says and speaking about what the Bible says is not politically correct. SAD, why yes it is!

My most sincere prayer for you and America is that you know the TRUTH. What you do with it is your business.   

See ya when I see ya!

Peace!

Mattie

Here's a Thought!!!!

Hello People!

How the heck are you doing? I hope you are well and that this writing finds you BLESSED!!! It has been awhile since I have been on here and every time I get on here I always say I am going to get on more often but I don't.  LOTS has happened since my last blog some good some bad but that's life as we know it right?

I am sitting in dismay at the latest things that have happened to me...unfortunately I THOUGHT I knew what disappointment was, but have since found out I was not even close.  It is a very hurtful thing when people you thought you knew, show you who they really are and the disappointment takes you to a place where you didn't want to go or even knew existed. It is these times I believe that is a test of your faith...whatever your faith maybe. What saddens me is that people can make up in their minds that they don't like someone then set out to make that person's life miserable. No real reason other than they just decided that 'I don't like this person and I don't want them around'....what is even sadder is that when people who are put in a place of authority and who is suppose to be neutral and keeping the peace join in with the small minds of those who have 'decided'.  What makes me sad is that my faith tells me that what God has in store for them is worst than anything I could even imagine or attempt to repay them, that is why I don't understand why people set out to do harm to do harm to other people when they know it will come back to them. If they don't believe what I believe I know we all believe in KARMA and I believe the saying goes, Karma is a BITCH!

Here is a thought the next time you have the chance to choose between doing something good and doing something bad...choose to do a good thing! Think about the good that will come back to you!!! Just my opinion, we all have free reign and the right to choose hopefully we choose wisely.

See ya when I see ya!

 Peace! Mattie

God Complex...You are not God!

Hello People!!!

How the heck are you doing? It's been awhile since I have been on here but I think I am getting better it has only been about a month instead of MONTHS!!!

I was watching this show the other day on The Discovery or maybe it was Investigation Discovery channel I am thinking it is called Fatal Encounters??? I don't remember it all now because it has been awhile and it was one of those shows where somebody gets killed and they try to figure it out and you always wonder why....this kid on the show killed his whole family! SERIOUSLY!!! He killed his stepmother and his three count them 3 little brothers, one of whom had ran outside and was about to get away and he convinced him to come back inside, that he would be okay. Then he shot him.  The kid said that he did it because his dad and his stepmother were always fighting and he knew that she was cheating on him so he decided he would save his brothers from the pain they were about to experience living in that house with stepmother who cheated and fought with their dad all the time.  He said he had a "God Complex" he thought that he would save them from the pain and that he knew what was best for them so he took them out along with the stepmother who he was sure was going to be the source of their pain. He gave a description of the killer to the cops and as he was describing the man who had done this crime the cops realized he was describing himself, from his hair down to his shoes.  The way they depicted it on TV they showed him looking down at himself sometimes to describe his shirt or shoes.  The killing of the whole family was just insane BUT it was what he said about thinking he wanted to save his family from the a pain that he perceived they were going to experience.  His perception of what he THOUGHT was going on with his family caused him to play 'God" and take these people out so HE could spare them some pain.

That kind of resonated with me...I see or hear about someone who has been hurt and I think God they can't handle that why didn't you let that happen to me? I have been through so much already that is not fair they weren't doing anything to anybody...I already know how to deal. I always think that people are good and want good things for themselves and the people they meet. I don't think anybody is out to hurt me or anyone else UNTIL they prove me wrong.  THEN like Maya Angelou said "when someone shows you who they are the first time BELIEVE them."  I was talking to my sister and we were talking about how we are all here for a reason, we all have some purpose to fulfill while we are here on this earth.  Unfortunately, and SADLY some of us are here to be victims of violent crimes to be murdered or disfigured or some don't make it here at all because their lives are aborted before they get here. My sadness for these people or people with domestic problems, family problems, financial problems. will never change. BUT my THOUGHT that I can handle the pain better and it should have been me has.

I have seen some shady people in my time and I have seen people be hurt for no apparent reason, and so have I.  BUT I am not going to take it anymore I am going to stand up and say NOT THIS TIME! Thank you for playing though!...just because people have a perception of you or assume things about you based on nothing more than innuendo and assumption does not mean there is something wrong with you.  This does not mean that you need to change you so THEIR perception of you will change. You do YOU and as long as you live your life in a manner that bad KARMA passes you by and good KARMA chases you down and runs you over....then you are living a good life!!

Be grateful at ALL times and never let them see you sweat!!!!

See ya when I see ya!

Peace! Mattie

Why Are People So Easily Disregarded???...

HELLO PEOPLE!!!!

How the heck are you doing? I hope this blog finds you well and in good health! You should be happy for everything that you have especially if you are able to walk, talk, have use of your limbs and able to tell the people around how you feel.

People are very fickle and self absorbed, and it is really sad when you think about it, no time for your fellow man 'it's all about me! What's in it for me!'

I have the Guardianship of my niece and she has been giving me fits since she has been here, I have had to put here in the Behavioral Health Unit because of her self imposed starvation 'diet'.  She has been sent home from school almost everyday since January when I got the Guardianship, for hitting the staff.  I guess I should be thankful she is hitting the adults and not the children, cause if you hit a grown person hard enough to bloody their nose...just imagine what that would of done to a child?! Wow! It is scary to think that one child, especially a handicapped child, can be that aggressive.  The Teacher and I have come to an agreement and worked out an Behavior plan where certain steps will be taken when she acts up in school.  Friday I went to her school and stayed with her thinking that would help, or so I could see what was going on since Thursday she bloodied the Teacher's Aide nose.  We go to school and wen to her first class, school was on a shortened cycle cause they were having an assembly that day. First class went rather smoothly, no incidents and she gets a Princess point for being good.  Second class, PE, we go outside and they walk around the track, do standing long jumps and softball throws.  She is playing and running and jumping around with the kids happy, smiling and laughing.  Next is lunch, she goes and gets her lunch and comes and sits at the table, she starts to eat and the rest of her class sits down around the table.  She gets up immediately and goes to throw her lunch in the garbage, she has only had one bite of it, I suggest she sit a the table I am STANDING next to.  She sits down and takes another bite, I am watching the kids in her class interact and eat their lunch along with the other kids that have descended upon the lunch room.  I decide I look pretty stupid standing up so I sit down, my mistake, NOW I really look stupid cause as soon as I sit down she throws her food in my lap. Why did you do that? A shrug of the shoulders and a blank stare.  Clean it up NOW! The teacher comes back to the table, cause I had asked about the YMCA after school program and she is shocked at what she sees.  She is now removed from the class for the rest of the lunch period. After lunch it is her job and one other students to pick up the dishes from the 'daycare' and take them upstairs and wash them.   She has a coughing attack which causes her to now be separated from the other student and Teacher's Aide, she coughs until she throws up.  She is taken to the nurse and given an icepack for her arm which she says hurts after having blood drawn that morning.  We go up to the kitchen to wash the dishes, this is the 'life skill' that they have chosen for her.  We get in the kitchen, she washes her hands, walks over to the dish rack holder (I don't know what its called) and she opens it pulls out a tray of dishes, looks at them and then turns around very calmly....very deliberately with the same blank stare and grabs the water hose from the ceiling and begins to hose down the Teacher's Aide!!! ARE YOU KIDDING ME!!!!! You are going to do that right in front of my face! ARE YOU SERIOUS!!!! We are DONE!!! Get your stuff let's go!!!!

Saturday is not any better, she gets up refuses to eat makes herself throw up and throws her food on the floor!  Pandemonium sets in...she is now on permanent for the rest of the day.  Gary and I start talking, actually yelling.  Gary says she needs to be put in an institution and just left there. Really?! And that will help who? Situations get tough or you get news that is not so good and people want to walk away and let somebody else deal with it and not take the time to try and help.  She is just trouble you should just get rid of her, they are going to kick her out of school and she is going to get you in trouble! Really.

It is really easy these days to let people and things go that are bothersome to us. You don't want a child abort it, even if you can't make that decision up until the day the BABY is being  delivered!  (Read this: Why the Media Blackout Over the Gosnell Trial? Daly Focus-online community- Focus on the family community.focusonthefamily.com).  This Society makes it all too easy to discard anything that is a problem, whether it is an actual problem or perceived ESPECIALLY when it comes to humans.  I see adds and posting all the time on Facebook about saving animals, dogs, cats, etc. PLEASE STOP ANIMAL ABUSE and the like is all over the media but aborting full term babies, what have you heard about that?  Nothing. Problem children...put them away, let somebody else worry about them, that would make your life so much easier and 'we could go back to the way we were'.  I had someone tell me about their cousin riding on a three wheeler and swerved to miss a dog that ran out in front of them. Upon swerving to miss the dog they hit a tree, the glass on the bike shattered a piece of which lodged between their tracheotomy and juggler, their teeth blew out their bottom lip and the list of things that happened went on and on. Thank GOD they are still alive.  I said to the person telling me this story, why didn't she just hit the dog? The look on the person's face said it all and sums up where our Society has gone.  The look was one that said, "I would rather she died than hit the dog!" That may not have been what they were thinking or even trying to communicate BUT that is what I saw in their face.   Sad when animals have become more important than human beings.

My niece has issues, correction ISSUES, there is no doubt about that and rather than perpetuate the issue and pass her off on someone else, why don't I see if I can help. Why don't I try to show her that somebody cares and is here for her no matter how hard she tries to push them away....yeah why don't we try that and see if that works.

My sister was saying that in the Bible you can read about Russia, Iran and Iraq but you don't read anything about the United States. I said that is because when the 'end' comes the United States will be the first thing blown off the map! And do you need to wonder why?


See ya when I see ya!

Peace! Mattie

Then what you should do...say THANK YOU!

Hello People!

How the heck have you been?!  I am sitting here watching 60 Minutes they are interviewing the families of the Sandy Hook tragedy.  The parents are talking about their children and the void that is left since they were taken.  The adults that lost their lives in an effort to save the lives of some children whether willingly or unwillingly, someone's child is here because of their efforts.  I was listening to them talk you can hear the heartache and pain in their voices.

Everyone is put on this planet for a reason it is sad when you realize that some of them where put here to be victims of horrendous crimes.  The moral of the story? I have no idea....BUT the one thing we can do is to remember them and pray for their families, especially when they pop into your minds. You should be truly THANKFUL that you were put on this earth to be something AWESOME!!!!

I have been thinking about writing a blog for awhile in regards to some of the things that I have heard recently.  I think the heart of most people has gone out of them and bitterness has set in where love should be.  Most people are probably thinking I am the LAST person on earth that should be talking about LOVE. Perhaps this is true and perhaps not.  BUT either way you look at it, some of the things that I have heard makes me sad and made me question whether or not people have feelings anymore or is everyone just about themselves now?!? Is it a me! ME! ME world now?  In one conversation in discussing the helicopter crash that happened in Flagstaff a few years ago a comment was made in regards to one of the people who died in the crash. I was told "I knew there was justice in the world when he died in that helicopter crash...cause he had been cheating on his time for a LONG time. He would come into work, clock in and then go sit down in the cafeteria and have lunch with his wife for an hour while still on the clock."  WOW! Really you think milking the clock is a crime punishable by death? Seriously?!  I have heard similar sayings in regards to other people who have died and prior to death had done some offense that someone thought DEATH was justice for their indiscretion.  It is amazing to me how some people, and believe it or not it is more of them than you know, who find relief, justice and/or humor in someone else's pain.  It is unbelievable to me that people would do that BUT they do!!!! SHOCKED! Sad as this maybe you should always try to look for the positive in every situation.  Just sayin' no matter how bad it is or you think it is, it could always be worst.

AND for the record, my interpretation of how Karma works is like this 'whatever you do to someone the SAME thing will be done to you OR something in the same vein. DEATH would not be 'justice' unless you have killed someone yourself and then....it is not for me to say.  Here is an example for you. I had someone doing all these unnecessary things for me that I neither asked for nor wanted, BUT they said they were doing it to HELP ME.  Here is the kicker they never asked me if I needed help, or if I wanted any help they were just out of the goodness of their heart 'helping me'.  What they did actually made what I was doing more difficult and take longer.  I heard from someone recently that this same person received the same 'helpfulness' that they gave me, in the same manner in which I got mine.  They didn't ask for it, they didn't want it and they didn't appreciate it when they got it.  Now you know how I felt!!:D) See that is KARMA at its best!!!!

When you look at where you are and at where you could be, you should be THANKFUL every chance you get, with every breath you take.

Just my opinion.

See ya when I see ya!

Peace!

Mattie

Time Will Tell They Say....

Hello People!

How the heck is life treating you? I hope all is well with everyone and that life is treating you extremely fabulous!!!!

SO we are still working out the kinks and trying to figure out this new arrangement.  Lots of things have happened in this short time some good some bad....BUT I am sure more things are going to happen before its all said and done and I am sure that time will tell if this works out as good as I hope it does.  Sitting here wearing tonight's dinner on the front of my shirt I have to wonder when will the good times start to roll....

Sometimes things don't work out the way you plan but in time things work out the way they are suppose to work out, we are not in control no matter how had we try and God works things out in His own time.  In the meantime I hope that He gives me strength...not enough to kill just enough to deal with the situation.  Just kidding but the situation is trying especially when all I am trying to do is help someone who in my opinion clearly needs help.  I was thinking that this was going to be a piece of cake, I would swoop in take my niece she would be SO HAPPY and we would just meld into one big dysfunctional family!  We got the dysfunctional down now we are working on the happy part.

The teacher tells me that I am in the process of correcting 14 years of behavior so it is going to take some time to correct.  I am sure the staff member that was hit with the carton of chocolate milk is hoping that the corrective action being taken would warp speed up to the day when the behavior is corrected and everyone is happy. Well, me too.  BUT I will keep trying and keep praying and hoping that at sometime the good times start to roll and EVERYBODY is happy and healthy.

Tomorrow is a holiday for some and I am sure those who get to enjoy the three day weekend are looking forward to Monday....I am looking forward to Monday too, not because I have the day off but because it is a work day and I get a break.

It is past my bedtime so I gotta go...I will try to get back on here soon I have so much to say but not the time to say it in and the words are hard to come by these days.

Take care people......

See ya when I see ya!

 Peace! Mattie

Life with Lynzee

Hello People!

How the heck have you been? It has been a long time since I have been blogging but....I would lie and say this is going to change but that may not be true so I will just say I will do my best to blog as often as I can.

Since my last post on here I have taken on another responsibility and so far it has been a challenge to say the least.  My niece who has Down Syndrome has been getting out of control and I thought that I would become her guardian and take 'control' of her so and get her back into control.  She is 14 years old, 5 foot tall and weighs 190 pounds, solid weight and attitude.  I have had her for two weeks now the first week, she hit the teacher's aide that teacher's aide was removed and another aide was put in her place. She was told that hitting is not acceptable and that if she did it again the consequences would be severe! SO not to be out done, the next teacher's aide was pinched, ah the challenge to see what she can get away with.  Each attempt to push the limits is met with a push back.  My niece is made to apologize for her actions each time, not just to say 'sorry' but to acknowledge what she did, i.e. I am sorry that I hit you. The start of the second week consists of doctor's visits to make sure she is healthy and there are no problems with her heart, she bares a long scar down her chest where she has had heart surgery in the past and 5'0"/190 cannot be good for the heart.  The news from the heart doctor and the Pediatrician are good, she is healthy but she obviously needs to lose weight. Enter programs that can help get the weight off and learn to eat healthy.

The second weekend has come and so do the challenges to push the boundaries at home. Friday night her food goes flying across the table in defiance because she is asked to make sure her food is going on her plate and not the table.  She was eating noodle soup and dropping the noodles on the table and when her bowl was put closer to her so that wouldn't happen, she flings the soup across the table onto the floor and into Stinky's face/lap.  NOT ACCEPTABLE! She is put to bed without any dinner and Gary explains to her that this is not acceptable behavior.  Saturday morning comes and breakfast is served, hands are washed and food is on the table.  My niece comes down and apologizes for her actions the previous day and Gary gives her a hug.  She sits at the table and begins to eat, I am in the process of sitting Stinky down, when apple juice hits me in the face. She has thrown her drink this time across the table and  onto the floor.  Chaos ensues as this type of behavior has not been seen in our house before. Stinky is stunned and her eyes are big, and yelling and abruptly escorting my niece to her bed is all I can do as I am so angry if I were to do more than that, it would probably cause bodily damage.  I go upstairs bring my niece down and make her clean up the mess she has made on the floor and table.  The dogs that were inside at the time have run to the door to get out!!!! When asked why she is acting this way and why she is throwing her food, my niece decides that this would be a good time to slap me!  I was told when addressing a child you should get down to their level, so since I am 6'2" I bent down to be at her level which gave her the opportunity to slap my face. WOW!!! I would be dead now if I would have even PRETENDED to raise my hand to my parents and striking them would have resulted in death or dismemberment, whichever occurred first.  

My niece spends four(4) hours on her bed after throwing her juice at the table, slapping me and acting out for no apparent reason.  I go upstairs and I talk to Lynzee and discuss the situation tell her again that her behavior is not acceptable and will not be tolerated, she comes down and we have no further incidents on Saturday, she indicates her stomach hours so she doesn't eat dinner.  Sunday morning (today) comes and I ask her what she wants for breakfast, she makes her request known to Gary and he prepares toast and oatmeal. We come down stairs and sit at the table, she takes a bite of her toast and then indicates that her stomach hurts so she is excused from the table.  No food or drink are thrown today....yay! We sit in the living room and she practices writing her name and numbers. I say to myself, well she is being good so I will call her little sister and let her wish her a happy birthday.  We call her sister, I hand her the phone she says "HAPPY BIRTHDAY TALIA!" then throws the phone in my face!  Again chaos, yelling and screaming ensues the dogs again who are in the house are trying desperately to get out !!!!  Why. WHY DO YOU THINK YOU CAN THROW THINGS AND HIT PEOPLE! WHY ARE YOU ACTING OUT! You are not going back to your dad and you're mom is jail and she is not coming so WHAT IS YOUR PROBLEM???!?!!!!! Nothing is the response.  I explain again to her that whatever she does to someone the same will be done to her. I didn't throw my iPhone5...the latest version on the market that costs $$$$$ at her but trust me she was punished! I don't know what turmoil this child is going through...I don't know what trauma she has been exposed to or what violence she has seen, but I hope that I am able to break the cycle and get her to a better place.  

Evening has come and we have gone to the grocery store without incident, she is offered food and again she indicates her stomach hurts so she does not eat.  She drinks lots of water and then raises her hand for a question. Yes? She makes a gesture of exercise  and says she wants to excise.  For the time being there is peace, she is doing yoga, or her version of it.  Thank God for peace!

I will try to post the progress we make and and hopefully it will be progress and not regress. I am calling the Doctor tomorrow since she has not eaten all weekend due to her 'alleged' stomach problems.

Until I blog again! PEACE!!!

See ya when I see ya! 

 Peace! Mattie