God Complex...You are not God!

Hello People!!!

How the heck are you doing? It's been awhile since I have been on here but I think I am getting better it has only been about a month instead of MONTHS!!!

I was watching this show the other day on The Discovery or maybe it was Investigation Discovery channel I am thinking it is called Fatal Encounters??? I don't remember it all now because it has been awhile and it was one of those shows where somebody gets killed and they try to figure it out and you always wonder why....this kid on the show killed his whole family! SERIOUSLY!!! He killed his stepmother and his three count them 3 little brothers, one of whom had ran outside and was about to get away and he convinced him to come back inside, that he would be okay. Then he shot him.  The kid said that he did it because his dad and his stepmother were always fighting and he knew that she was cheating on him so he decided he would save his brothers from the pain they were about to experience living in that house with stepmother who cheated and fought with their dad all the time.  He said he had a "God Complex" he thought that he would save them from the pain and that he knew what was best for them so he took them out along with the stepmother who he was sure was going to be the source of their pain. He gave a description of the killer to the cops and as he was describing the man who had done this crime the cops realized he was describing himself, from his hair down to his shoes.  The way they depicted it on TV they showed him looking down at himself sometimes to describe his shirt or shoes.  The killing of the whole family was just insane BUT it was what he said about thinking he wanted to save his family from the a pain that he perceived they were going to experience.  His perception of what he THOUGHT was going on with his family caused him to play 'God" and take these people out so HE could spare them some pain.

That kind of resonated with me...I see or hear about someone who has been hurt and I think God they can't handle that why didn't you let that happen to me? I have been through so much already that is not fair they weren't doing anything to anybody...I already know how to deal. I always think that people are good and want good things for themselves and the people they meet. I don't think anybody is out to hurt me or anyone else UNTIL they prove me wrong.  THEN like Maya Angelou said "when someone shows you who they are the first time BELIEVE them."  I was talking to my sister and we were talking about how we are all here for a reason, we all have some purpose to fulfill while we are here on this earth.  Unfortunately, and SADLY some of us are here to be victims of violent crimes to be murdered or disfigured or some don't make it here at all because their lives are aborted before they get here. My sadness for these people or people with domestic problems, family problems, financial problems. will never change. BUT my THOUGHT that I can handle the pain better and it should have been me has.

I have seen some shady people in my time and I have seen people be hurt for no apparent reason, and so have I.  BUT I am not going to take it anymore I am going to stand up and say NOT THIS TIME! Thank you for playing though!...just because people have a perception of you or assume things about you based on nothing more than innuendo and assumption does not mean there is something wrong with you.  This does not mean that you need to change you so THEIR perception of you will change. You do YOU and as long as you live your life in a manner that bad KARMA passes you by and good KARMA chases you down and runs you over....then you are living a good life!!

Be grateful at ALL times and never let them see you sweat!!!!

See ya when I see ya!

Peace! Mattie